Why Do I Cry Every Time I See My Therapist?
Crying in therapy can be a common and even expected experience. For many, it’s a sign that they are accessing deep, meaningful emotions. But if you find yourself crying every time you see your therapist, you might wonder why this happens and whether it’s okay. In this blog, we’ll explore why crying in therapy is often a good thing, how to know when it might be too much, and how therapists should respond to your tears. We’ll also discuss various reasons for crying in therapy, from emotional backlog to feeling validated, and examine when crying might indicate an issue, such as feeling pressured or inadequate.
It’s Okay to Cry in Therapy
Normalizing Tears
Crying in therapy is a natural response to accessing deep emotions. It’s a safe space where you can express feelings you might suppress in your daily life. According to Dr. Judith Orloff, a psychiatrist and author, “Crying is part of the body’s natural healing process.” It helps release pent-up emotions and can lead to greater self-understanding and emotional relief.
A Sign of Progress
For many, crying is a sign that they are making progress in therapy. It indicates that you are allowing yourself to feel and process emotions, which is a critical part of healing. At Arvada therapy practices like Rocky Mountain Relational Therapy, therapists encourage clients to embrace their emotions, including tears, as a pathway to deeper healing.
When It’s Too Much
However, there can be times when crying feels overwhelming or counterproductive. If you find that your tears are preventing you from discussing important topics or making you feel worse, it might be a sign to explore this reaction further with your therapist.
How a Therapist Should Respond to Your Tears
Providing a Safe Space
A good therapist should provide a safe, supportive environment where you feel comfortable expressing your emotions. They should acknowledge your feelings and offer empathy without making you feel judged or embarrassed. A good Arvada therapist should be trained to handle such moments with the utmost sensitivity and care.
Avoiding Pressure
Therapists should of course avoid pressuring you to stop crying or dismissing your emotions. Instead, they should help you explore what’s behind the tears and support you in processing those feelings. It is widely accepted that receiving both understanding and acceptance from your therapist can be incredibly empowering.
Balancing Support and Exploration
While offering comfort, therapists should also guide you in understanding why you’re crying. This balance of support and exploration can help you gain insights into your emotional patterns and work towards healing. Quoting from Carl Rogers, a pioneer in person-centered therapy; “When the other person is hurting, confused, troubled, anxious, alienated, terrified; or when he or she is doubtful of self-worth, uncertain as to identity, then understanding is called for. The gentle and sensitive companionship of an empathic stance… provides illumination and healing. In such situations, deep understanding is, I believe, the most precious gift one can give to another.”
Reasons for Crying in Therapy
Emotional Backlog
One reason people cry in therapy is due to an emotional backlog. When you suppress your feelings for a long time, therapy can open the floodgates, allowing these pent-up emotions to flow freely. This release can be therapeutic and help you feel lighter and more at peace.
Stirred-Up Feelings
Therapy often involves discussing difficult or painful topics, which can naturally stir up strong emotions. Talking about past traumas, current stresses, or unresolved conflicts can bring these feelings to the surface, leading to tears.
Feeling Seen and Heard
For many, therapy is the first time they feel truly seen and heard. This validation can be incredibly moving, especially if you’ve felt misunderstood or ignored in other parts of your life, which can result in some overwhelming emotions. Tears can flow from the good feelings of validation and safe connection with your therapist, just as much as from feelings of sadness or grief at how these important foundations have previously been missing from relationships.
Safety and Trust
Crying can also be a sign that you feel safe enough to show your true emotions. A strong therapeutic alliance, built on trust and empathy, allows clients to let their guard down and express their innermost feelings.
Unhealthy Reasons for Crying in Therapy
Feeling Pressured
Sometimes, there’s a possbility that crying in therapy can stem from feeling pressured by your therapist or the therapeutic process. If you feel forced to discuss topics you’re not ready to explore, this can lead to distress and tears. It’s important to communicate these feelings to your therapist so they can adjust their approach.
Feeling Inadequate
Crying might also result from feelings of inadequacy or shame. If therapy sessions make you feel judged or criticized, it can trigger these emotions. A good therapist will work to ensure you feel supported and understood, rather than inadequate.
Oversharing
If you find yourself oversharing in therapy, it can lead to feelings of vulnerability and overwhelm, which might result in tears. It’s important to pace yourself and share at a rate that feels comfortable for you.
Conclusion
Crying in therapy is a natural and often beneficial part of the healing process. It’s a sign that you are accessing and processing deep emotions. However, it’s also important to ensure that crying doesn’t become overwhelming or counterproductive. All therapists at Rocky Mountain Relational Therapy, a leading Arvada therapy practice, are trained to support you through these emotional experiences, providing a safe space where you can explore your feelings without judgment. By understanding the reasons behind your tears and communicating openly with your therapist, you can navigate your emotional journey more effectively and work towards greater healing and self-understanding.
If you’re considering working with a therapist in Arvada, Rocky Mountain Relational Therapy serves Arvada and surrounding communities including Alta Vista Area, Arvada Plaza Area, Scenic Heights, Lamar Heights, Allendale Area, Rainbow Ridge, Club Crest, Highlands, Northwest Arvada, Wheat Ridge. The first step is to schedule a free initial consultation; that way you can get a feel for us and decide whether we’re best placed to help you. Simply call (720)-580-3866 or visit our booking page to schedule your consultation.